LIFE IS GREAT

At about 3:30 yesterday there was a knock at the door and there stood my eldest boy, his lovely partner and MALI.  I was so astounded that all I could do was cry/blubber... something I do and the kids love to watch...

There had been a few hints during the week but I did not dare to hope that I would be spending Easter with one of my beloved grandies.

She immediately burst into tear as she does not really know us.  What a joy!!! She has been here for less than 24 hours and I have already laughed, cried and fed her pancakes.  I love you Mali.

12 MIDNIGHT cont'd

Nope it didn't work.  2pm was the last time I looked at the clock......

12 MIDNIGHT

Well it's 12 midnight and I can't sleep.  When the lights go out my mind starts to think of all those things that in the day I can distract myself from.  They literally come pouring in.  Al lies beside me with seemingly no worries but not me!  I think of all the bills that I have to pay tomorrow, payday has finally arrived.  I think of my grandchildren and why they are soooo far away from me.  I think of my own children and al the mistakes tht I made with them.  I think of my sisters and the relationships that I have with them or don't have with them.  I think of my mum and how we don't talk anymore.  All this goes round and round. I draw no conclusions or have any great epiphanies, just thoughts. 

I try reading, picturing each feature of my grandies, constructing a quilt, writing letters of gratutude to my grandies etc.  Each has its own reward but still no sleep comes.  So now I turn to the blog to see if bearing my soul will help.  I will let you know sometime.

WHATS IN A NAME

Some people may wonder why the name of Jellybean.  When my mother was pregnant with me my dad had all the pains and cravings.  One of the main craving was jellybeans, hence when I popped out he nicknamed me JELLYBEAN.

So welcome to my place you never know what could happen!!!

Love Jellybean xoxo